She Writes

MAYA! Hey, girlie. I'm a bit unsure of this. I think it is a good idea, but I know it could use some editing. ------CRIT--------- Be independent! don't sit there, ...

Welcome to YWS !! I'm sure you'll love it here. =] Listen to niteowl. That girl's got some good tips that will definetley help you out ... She's someone you ...

Hey Maya! Maybe you could try using poem format? Like: Maybe, If you keep pulling the strings You might find something. Or maybe not. If you keep pulling the strings ...

Here 'goes..(sorry if it isnt too good, I wrote the crit late last night and I was tired:) The air was like a nerve gas: neither he, nor she, could ...

....... Well, here is how I'd clean up the...err...mess: D ivorce sucks, Y es it does. Parents seperating, M aking you be [s]constantly[/s] on the move, I wish there was ...

This is not too great...I am sorry if that sounded rude. :( But really, like everyone says, typos and puntuation are very nessicary. It seemed like you didn't put any ...